Early Retirement

I have retired…retired from people pleasing! As this birthday approached, I found myself reflecting on a lot of things. My skin has changed. I’m now trying to find the right skin care routine for anti-aging. My metabolism has changed. I have to fight those few extra pounds a little harder these days. Hair…yea, that’s changed too! I’ve recently noticed it doesn’t have the luster that it once did. Those are all physical, but I’ve changed my way of thinking too.

My house, until this year, was decorated in darker colors. I’m now in the process of changing everything over to light and bright! I’ve started venturing out more. For several years, I have chosen to relish in the security and privacy of being at home. I wasn’t a hermit by any means, but other than activities involving my gals, I pretty much stayed in. I was afraid “people may talk.” This brings me to my retirement! LOL

I have always wanted to be the “fixer”. I never wanted to let anyone down, always wanting to be worthy of the pedestal my parents and sister put me on. I have always wanted to be accepted. Rejection has knocked me down more than once. Many times, I have sacrificed my own happiness. I have put my peace, reputation, desires and opinions aside, in hopes of avoiding just that…another rejection. After 44 years (ouch that stings a little, lol), I have finally stood in front of the mirror, looked myself in the eyes and said “I am who God created Marada to be”.

I am getting back to the REAL me. I wear bright colors, makeup, color my hair and like a spray tan. If that makes me high maintenance, so be it. I shop consignment stores, discount stores, yard sales…wait!!! There I go explaining myself again! There’s no more to say about it. I look the way I look and that’s that.

I love Jesus. I was baptized in 2000. The very first thing I do every morning, is read my daily Bible verse. I pray daily and if I tell someone that I will pray, you can bank on it, I will. However, I fail Him miserably, every single day. Regardless if it’s gossip, a “bad word”, a “little white lie”…WE ALL SIN!

Blogging was something I had talked about for years. Fear of what people may think, held me back. I don’t think I’m famous LOL! I don’t think I have a dream life! In fact, far from it. My life has included some very high mountaintops and some extremely low valleys. My story has beautiful chapters and some that it pains me to relive. I may help some newly divorced, single mom realize that she will make it. You may learn some 3 ingredient recipe that looks like you spent hours on it. And I will definitely give you ideas to “use what you have”! Some will love it. Some will hate it. Some will cheer me on. Some will snicker behind my back. I’m all in, because remember I’m “retired” now! LOL

Marada